


Lines in the sand

by CirrusGrey



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Episode Related, M/M, Short, Talking, episode 183 spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-10-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:21:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 865
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27045643
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CirrusGrey/pseuds/CirrusGrey
Summary: SPOILERS FOR MAG 183!!!"You know how you said this place, this domain, was a monument to hubris?""Yes?""I'm really feeling that right now."
Relationships: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist
Comments: 22
Kudos: 149





	Lines in the sand

**Author's Note:**

> If these two dorks keep up the healthy communication and talking openly about their feelings and anxieties I'm going to run out of stuff to write about oh jeeze

Jon let Martin take the lead as they walked.

It was difficult, if he was being honest with himself, shortening his own stride so that he didn't end up rushing ahead and outpacing him, but it was important. Martin deserved to be able to set his own speed of travel to his own domain, to take as long as necessary to process what they were heading towards before they got there.

He wasn't hesitating. His gaze was fixed firmly ahead on the Monument, his steps were sure and steady. There was tension in the set of his shoulders and the clench of his jaw, but it was the sort of tension Jon had seen on him before, when he faced any task he knew was going to be difficult, but necessary. It was grim determination.

Jon loved him. So, so much.

He took a few quick steps so that he was walking at Martin's side, then slowed his pace again to match him. Martin gave him a glance of acknowledgement before turning his eyes back to the building.

Jon reached over and took his hand, giving it a short, encouraging squeeze.

"How are you holding up?"

Martin shrugged minutely. "Fine, I guess."

"Do you... want to talk about it?"

His hand twitched. "There isn't much to say, is there?"

Jon glanced at him out of the corner of his eye. His mouth was set in a stubborn line.

"There's always things to talk about," Jon said lightly. "It just depends on whether or not you  _ want  _ to talk about them."

Martin was silent for a long moment. "You know how you said this place, this domain, was a monument to hubris?"

"Yes?"

"I'm  _ really  _ feeling that right now."

Jon couldn't help it; he laughed. "In what way?"

"I was  _ so sure _ I had it figured out," Martin said, shaking his head. "So sure I knew my place in all of this, I-" He sighed. "I just pushed aside any thoughts to the contrary. I mean, you  _ tried  _ to tell me I had a domain, ages ago, and I just didn't want to hear it." His lips twisted in a frown. "I've been drawing this- this line in the sand, between  _ us  _ and  _ them, _ and now it turns out I've been one of  _ them  _ all along."

Jon hummed. "I mean," he said. "So have I? You  _ knew  _ I had a domain, I've never been-" He paused. "The line in the sand you were drawing. You always knew what side  _ I _ was on."

"I know..." The tense lines of Martin's face softened. "But... it was  _ us. _ The human and the Avatar, defying expectations, banding together to fight against the system." He chuckled darkly. "Not the two Watchers ganging up on the Watched and going on a murder spree."

"Ah." Jon paused. "It doesn't change the morals of it, you know. Whether you have a domain or not, the whole... the 'Kill Bill' strategy, the end results are the same. No matter which side of the line you're on."

"I know," he said softly. "It just...  _ feels  _ different. I'd..." He sighed. "I'd decided that they deserved to die. All of them. Because they were benefiting from people suffering. But it turns out I'm doing the same thing."

Jon bit his lip. "Not me."

"What?"

"Not all of them. Not me." He looked at Martin. "You'd already made an exception for one person, because I was - I am -  _ trying  _ to do what's right. So are you. Whatever the consequences are, we're _ trying." _

Martin looked away. "It's a lot easier to make exceptions for the person you love than for yourself," he muttered.

"I am  _ well  _ aware," Jon said, huffing around a laugh.

Martin glanced back at him, a half-smile tugging at his lips. "I'll stop overthinking my culpability in all of this if you promise to do the same."

Jon opened his mouth soundlessly, then closed it again. Pursed his lips. "You know I'm not going to do that."

"Yeah, I know," Martin said, looking smug. "So good luck convincing me to stop."

Jon rolled his eyes. "I'm starting to see why you get annoyed with me for changing the subject every time you bring it up."

"Turnabout is fair play, my love," Martin said, then nudged Jon's arm with his own. "I'm honestly fine, Jon, you don't have to worry. It's... a  _ lot, _ but right now I just want to face it head-on. Take it as it comes and decide how I feel about it once it's in front of me. We've still got a ways to go first.”

"We do." Jon raised their hands to his lips, pressing a kiss to the back of Martin's. "But if you want to talk about it, I'm here."

Martin turned to the road ahead, steps picking up speed as he faced their destination. Jon kept pace with him, matching him stride for stride. Martin still had that intense look of determination on his face, but the grim inevitability had leached out of it. He looked less like a man going to face his own execution, at the very least. A smile flickered at the corners of his lips. "I know."


End file.
